With today’s announcement of pre-season friendlies for Saints at both Bournemouth and Brighton, the usual ‘banter’ broke out on Social Media about South Coast supremacy.
It got me thinking. The relationships between the clubs on the South Coast are complicated and have a completely different outlook depended on which beach you choose to sunbathe. I thought I would write this blog post as a way of explaining to outsiders of our beautiful coastal wonderland just how relationships work and I thought I would do this through the medium of the popular kid’s TV show ‘Game of Thrones’.
If you’ve not seen Game of Thrones, it is about several houses of people living within close proximity in the fantasy realm of Westeros and relationships are strained to say the least…..
So where do the clubs of the South Coast sit in terms of hierarchy? I think this should clear it up.
I’ll start at the bottom.
Pompey. Pompey are Theon Greyjoy. To start with he was prosperous, but it was on the back of another house’s fortune. While things were going well his dick was well and truly overused and now it’s been cut off. At his lowest ebb now and the least threat of the entire kingdom. Fancies his sister. Hates the Lannisters.
Brighton. Brighton are House Tully. They’re in it, but no one really knows why. Slightly detached geographically from the rest and with little to no role to play in the grand scheme of things. Hates the Lannisters.
Bournemouth. Bournemouth are House Stark. Plucky, everyone’s favourite but ultimately toothless. Hates the Lannisters.
Southampton. Southampton are House Lannister. Hated by everybody else but without doubt the top dog. Sitting on the Iron Throne they draw venom from all of their neighbours.
Of course like the TV show, this is all stuff and nonsense but if that doesn’t clear it up then hopefully this helpful graphic will.